29 January 2008

Lack of blog related to lack of love!

Well, it’s been eternity since I last posted a blog. I think that part of the reason behind the lack of postage, if you will, is the lack of a love interest. So, I think that it’s time to go with that and see what I can come up with as I write. I mean, this is what a blog is all about, right?

As with most women, I am preoccupied with love in the back of my mind. Regardless of what is in the forefront requiring my attention, in the back of my mind the one thing that I want the most is to find “the one.” Is there really a “one?” I venture to say yes and no. I think that there is a right one at the right time. Plenty of people can be compatible with a variety of people, but it’s ultimately our choice to nurture a relationship – nurtured by both people – and ultimately make the relationship into that of which dreams are made.

As I mentioned earlier, my lack of blog is directly related to lack of love. Sometimes I have to wonder if I’m a hopeless (as opposed to hopeful) romantic. I mean, I know I’m obsessed with love stories – romantic comedies and Jane Austen occupy much of my entertainment world. But is it unhealthy to expect the kind of love, devotion and passion that is found in these works? I have to say NO. We see so many relationships call it quits these days. Divorce is easier and easier and many people go into a marriage anticipating the possibility of divorce. There are a variety of reasons for divorce, but the one I want to address right now is the fact that so many people (especially women) simply settle. Women are so in love with being in love that they’ll often settle for someone that doesn’t treat them as well as they should or doesn’t have enough like-mindedness to work through the obstacles that absolutely will occur in a marriage. Women will settle because the idea of being in a relationship (regardless of whether or not it is a healthy relationship) is more appealing than being alone.

I’ve consistently had the desire to marry someone in my own faith. That requirement is non-negotiable. For me, this would help in finding someone who is like-minded. I have seen too many relationships become painful because there isn’t the common ground of faith and devotion to an eternal perspective. I refuse to compromise that which is precious to me above all else. Whatever one’s beliefs are, I think relationships can be a little bit easier when both individuals have common long-term goals. No man or relationship will ever be worth compromising my faith.

However, I also think that this is the reason that I have lack of love at this point in my life. It has nothing to do with “wookin pa nub in all da wong pwaces!” It’s just… I don’t know what it is, really. But I have to believe that as long as I am trying my best to be my best and looking for ways to love and serve the world around me, I will be led to the one at that place when it’s time. And if I commit myself to not settle for less than I am worth, I can avoid much heartache. There is a popular LDS figure (John Bytheway) that has said several things on this matter, “You can fall in love with someone you should not be with,” and “It’s better to be alone and miserable than miserable with someone else.” I truly do believe those things. So in the meantime, while my Mr. Darcy is en route to me, I’ll do my best to be happy where I am and at the same time keep the hope alive that underneath it all, the kind of love that we all hope for is alive and well for all of us if we’re willing to be patient. After all, the best things in life are worth waiting for, right?