2010 Wishlist

Well, here it is. The 2010 wishlist. I am having a hard time thinking of things, though... These are in no particular order. The first thing shown, doesn't have to be that same brand or anything, just a pic of one to give a general idea. Anyway... What kinds of things are on YOUR wishlist? Comment me and let the games begin!

Crisis Averted!

Well after much anxiety I have a definite course of action before me that is quite achievable! After meeting with an advisor at Lake Erie College, I have a plan. For several weeks I’ve been overcome with anxiety as I thought about returning to school and what it was going to do to my life – especially when the class schedule offered at LEC was not conducive to my work schedule – not in any way, shape or form. But la! The advisor at LEC has informed me that there are quite a few classes that I can take through Lakeland Community College that will transfer and count for my major in Middle School Education at LEC. So, I’m not back in the process of discussing things with LCC. I’ve got a good few semesters worth of classes that I can take at LCC, which not only means that classes will be available when I can take them, but they will be far less expensive! Can we say win/win?! Next step is meeting with the Ed. Advisor at LCC and registering for classes at the end of the month! So excited and relieved!



In other news, I’ve been constantly thinking about and considering selling Pampered Chef… Anyone have any experience with this type of venture that you may want to expound upon? Comment it up and let me in on the good, the bad and the ugly!

Life and stuff

So things are moving right along with my plans for school... I've filled out my FAFSA and am waiting for the school to process my FA info - hopefully I will be able to find a way to fund my educational pursuits without having to incur a ton of debt. Debt is not my idea of fun. Especially in this economy and especially when aside from my vehicle and student loans from 1995 (there's not that much, it's just been deferred for the more part of the last 15 years until more recently) I'm in debt to no one. As far as I know anyway ;)

I'm getting pretty excited at the prospect of starting classes. I've got my transcript evaluation all done and it looks like there are 3 core reqs that I'm gonna need. Boo to having to take my first Math class since Fall 1995. And a science with a lab. Who cares about science?! And a critical thinking class, I believe there are two choices. I keep reading class descriptions and get a little nervous about attending a small liberal arts college... Cause I am a thoroughly conservative libertarian, and there's a lot of liberal mumbo jumbo that can drive me a wee bit batty. So we shall see how this all progresses :)

Anyway... In other news... I started attending Weight Watchers classes about 3 months ago. I really enjoy it. The information isn't new, really, but I have really liked having that return and report accountability. It's helped me to track everything I consume and think twice about what and when I eat, etc. I'm rather enjoying it and really like the other class members. I've lost almost 15 lbs just by doing it - rarely, if ever, exercising. It's not just a clever marketing campaign when they say, "because it works!" Ha. I even explained the points to my mom and she doesn't necessarily write and track everything, but watches what she eats and she's lost 16 lbs in the last 3 months. So it's all pretty exciting stuff. So, the past two weeks or so the LBS have been slow moving, though still downward, which is good! And in the past two weeks I've commented to my WW leader that I "just need to consistently exercise and get over this sporadic mess." So she personally challenged me to work out 5 times this week. I think I'll make it 4 - 1 hour sessions. I've got plans (Blue Man Group) Thursday and I don't work out on Sundays. And I won't have time to workout prior to the meeting Monday night (but can after!). So I'll be interested to see how this week's higher commitment to exercising non-sporadically will affect Monday night's results! Normally, I might say "thick-thinking" (it's a FRIENDS reference), but in THIS case, I might just have to say "thin-thinking!" I may or may not keep you posted. ;)

OK, so I think this might be the longest and most informative blog that I've written in many a moon... So with that, I will bid you adieu.

one your mark, get set and go now!

Got a dream and we just know now! We're gonna make that dream come true!

Guess what? I got in! Yay for Lake Erie College!!!!! I am planning to start school in January, part-time, as I will be continuing to work full-time (for now).
I am waiting to hear back from the transfer students admissions advisor (who is on vaca) about getting an appointment so that I can make my academic plan.
Oh, and figure out how I'm gonna pay for this *eek*! But, I'm super excited. The plan will be to get my degree in middle school education, with my concentrations in language arts and social studies. YAHOO!!!!!!!!

forrreeeeeever

OK. About a week or so ago, I'd (finally) heard back from a contact in admissions at LEC. In said email, I was informed that a decision should be made and I'd hear something... by the end of LAST week. I've been checking the mail like crizazy every day. I hate the suspense of not knowing.

why is it once we've decided that we can wait forever for something that it actually starts to feel like it will BE forever until that thing is brought to pass. returning to school, marriage, kids. LIFE. Life waits for no one. And yet I'm in the longest proverbial line ever. Just saying.

Hadn't posted for awhile. I thought I'd give you something.

Update on the approaching change

Hello everyone! Thought I'd update my blog - as per usual my posts are at best sporadic. So previously I'd mentioned returning to school to pursue HR Management... Many of you may know, however, that my first choice was actually Education. I had been looking for online programs for an undergrad in Ed. and it was all to no avail. There were so few of them and it just didn't seem to be working out.
Cut to my meeting with the academic counselor at Lakeland Community College. In our discussions, she told me about the affiliations they have with other schools in order to assess my options for the HRM degree. When I realized that there were options out there that I had not yet been able to consider... I asked if per chance any of these affiliations happened to have an Education degree. There was one with Cleveland State University, though, I would eventually need to go to classes in downtown Cleveland to finish up there [at CSU]. However, the counselor also mentioned another option which is actually nearer! She said that Lake Erie College actually has an Education program. LEC is actually even closer than LCC to where I live. Bonus, right?
That night I began looking into it - dropped the classes for which I had registered at LCC and within the next two days, I had ordered all of my previous transcripts, requested two of my acquaintances to send letters of recommendation and completed the online application (essay and all).
Since then I've just been waiting to hear. I had emailed one of the admissions advisors and wanted to make sure that they had all of my information, and agonizingly it took over a week to hear back. I heard back today and received confirmation that they did indeed receive all of the necessary information and I should hear back on the decision by the end of next week! Yay! So I've got fingers crossed. I'm really hoping this all works out! I'm so anxious to get everything squared away and plan things out with the timeline, determine how long it will take me to actually get my degree (I will need to continue working full-time and attend school part-time at first), etc.
In Ohio there's a middle school education degree which certifies teaching 4th-9th grade. I'm all over that. With this degree, you pick two of four areas of concentration: math, science, language arts and social studies. The latter two subjects will be my subjects of preference. TOTALLY excited. Again, I just hope and pray that everything falls into place for this plan. I've been wanting to do this for quite some time, and it finally feels like this might be the answer! So thick thinking (aka lucky thoughts)!!!

Change approaching!

Well I've got my meeting this week with an academic counselor at the College I'm planning to start classes! Hopefully they've received all of my transcripts and I'll be able to get some encouraging news at the meeting. I've already registered for a couple of classes and have been waiting for this meeting to discuss things and make sure that things are on track.

I'm still wondering at times what I REALLY want to be when I grow up. Honestly, more than any worldly career, I'd love to be a wife and mother, but seeing as though I haven't found the right opening for which to apply for that position, I must continue elsewhere! In discussing the idea of careers with a friend of mine, she suggested that I take a career test at my college. I may inquire on that and see what it turns out saying. So stay tuned, and I'll keep you updated :)

Also, if you're interested in Jane Austen, check out: www.janeaustenanonymous.blogspot.com
:)

Stress Fest

For the love of everything good in this life. The last few weeks have been stress fest for me. I've gotten to that point where corporate America is sucking my will to live. And I feel stuck. Even with the change approaching this fall of returning to school and with the hopes of improving and bettering myself and my situation (which isn't BAD, per se, just AAAAHG). Something has got to give, though. Living a life where on Sunday afternoon all of a sudden a ball of anxiety begins to churn in your stomach because of the approaching week and all that it will bring... Well, that's just not a good thing. Granted, I will be given an opportunity soon to work some from home and the days of 70+ mile one way commutes have come to an end... But I'm wondering if it will ultimately make me feel any better. So I've just been spending much of my life feeling frustrated lately.
It seems to me that there are very few lucky ones out there - very few people that love what they do. I've often heard people say that the real trick to life is to do what you love and find a way to get paid doing it. So if anyone has any suggestions on how I can make bank being me, holla at a sista.

In the meantime I'll live like there's no tomorrow...

Recently, I had read a few blogs and discussed with a few other “singles” the idea of having held back on life decisions because “what if…” What if I meet someone next year, how can I be in school, move, change jobs, etc. One such blog post, by Why I’m Still Single, discussed this and how, essentially, it equates to basing your life decisions on a person that doesn’t even exist [in your life yet]. I’ve come to realize and accept that while I may have begun this behavior subconsciously, I perpetuated it mini-consciously. You know, not really admitting it to myself even while the thought floats by ever so briefly…

I have decided that the time has come to live my life the way it was meant to be lived. I have been toying with the idea of returning to school for quite some time. I’ve been back in Ohio now for 4 years. I never planned on being here that long, and at the time chose not to attend school with the thought that “I might not be living here next year,” or whatever the excuse may be. Now, I’m saying, "screw that mess!"

I’ve pondered upon it, and this past weekend made the first step. Granted, it’s community college, but education is education and it will work with my work schedule. Although it isn’t working toward what I had previously thought about pursuing, I am pleased at this time with the decision to pursue a degree in Human Resources. I’m in the process now of getting everything squared away in order to begin classes this fall. It’s an exciting change, a new path toward progress. I’m hoping that it will work out with the timing of other life situations so that in a couple of years I will complete an AS in HRM and be able to expand my occupational horizons, perhaps with a move elsewhere and idealy continuing my education further – the options can and will be unlimited. There is no imaginary potential person holding me down or back.

What it all really boils down to is fear. We often doubt ourselves to such an extent that we render ourselves incapable of the potential lying before us. There comes a time when you just have to take a leap into the unknown and allow yourself to realize your capabilities. The trick is to learn to navigate the twists and turns with an open mind and open heart and accept that even when things don’t work out exactly the way we had expected or wanted, it doesn’t mean we’re at a dead end - sometimes the twists and turns are what really fulfill the dreams we didn't even know we had.

A collage... A stolen idea from my friend's amazing blog!

So fun - an autobiographical collage!






QUESTIONS:
1. What is your name?
2. What is your favorite food?
3. What is your hometown?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. What is your favorite movie?
6. What is your favorite drink?
7. What is your dream vacation?
8. What is your favorite dessert?
9. What is one word to describe yourself?
10. How are you feeling right now?
11. What do you love most in the world?
12. What do you want to be when you grow up?

Directions
- Go to Google image search and do be careful.
- Type in your answer to each question.
- Choose a picture from the first three pages
- Use this website (http://bighugelabs.com/flickr/mosaic.php) to make your collage.

Four years? Seriously?!

So I meant to post this last week... But here it is!

It was four years ago this week that I had gotten all of my belongings packed up and I left Salt Lake City. I miss my life there muchly, but I can see many reasons why I have been where I now am. I’ve had so many opportunities since moving home! I never ever dreamed that Ashtabula, Ohio would hold much for me. I was wrong, however.
When I left SLC, it was with a heavy heart, which led to a broken heart. I had hopes of moving to the east coast to another area high in LDS Singles population, however, that was not my lot at that time. Instead:
- I found a great job
- I’ve been able to serve in my stake and as an ordinance worker at the temple
- I was able to get out of debt
- I was able to purchase a car with a good down payment when I needed to
- I was able to get lasik
- I was able to go on my dream vacation to England and France
- I’m able to spend time with my oldest friends and be here for many of their important life events
- The above also goes for family and family events
- My mind has opened politically, intellectually and spiritually and all three can be combined!

This, and so much more, has been the result of what I never dreamed would be a good thing. I’ve had experiences and opportunities I never expected. There’s still so many more dreams to earn, but I feel like this was an appropriate stop along the way to so much more than I ever considered would be possible. So even though Ashtabula can be quite the social challenge for a single LDS woman, it’s proven to be more than I ever imagined it could be.

A lady's imagination...

"A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment." - Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice

And this is why Jane Austen transcends time. She understood human nature SO well and characterized so vividly so many of these human idiosyncrasies. P&P was written 200 years ago, and yet I've seen myself fall into this trap that Darcy describes.

It's so easy for women to go from hello to I do in the blink of their mind's eye. I think that it boils down to the fact that we are so in love with the idea of being in love that we hope for it at every corner. The trick is to learn how to rein in this psychotic phenomena. Knowing is half the battle, right ladies?

I think that in my past this rapid succession of a non-relationship has contributed to my perpetual non-relationships. My mind's eye has flashed forward to a happily ever after and I hold on to this fictional story - waiting, wishing, hoping and tormenting myself into yet another broken heart. And yet I must accept most of the responsibility for this broken heart because I had created such a strong attachment to someone that never reciprocated it. I was waiting for the reciprocation, but it never came. And so like Elinor in Sense and Sensibility, I suffer all of the disappointment of a broken attachment without ever having enjoyed the rewards.

I won't lie, though... As much as it sucks to not have much of a "dating pool" where I am now and in the demographic to which I belong, it's usually much more serene than what I'd had before. It's also given me time to solidify my determination to not settle for someone who is a stranger to reciprocity.

And those are my few thoughts for the night... ps, yes, Jane Austen IS indeed my homegirl :)

Mr Clutter update

Well this weekend i've been quarantined due to pink eye. so i straightened up the clutter of my vanity a wee bit. it's so much better. but. i have a LOT of stuff. If you need any clinique lipstick, let me know. I can hook you up. :) And ps, remember the whole free gift with purchase post awhile back? the post with the multitude of pics of makeup bags? yeah. It's April. I've gotten 3 Clinique bonuses this year so far... Is it a sickness? It just might be. pps, pink eye sucks. but crises endured. my eyes are almost normal again! yay for antibiotics!

Please, Mr. Clutter!

I sang that to the tune of “Please Mr. Custer, I don’t wanna go!” hahah. I’m a freak like that. I will avoid the ceremonious pointing out of the horror of my lack of bloggage and just get on with it ;)

Lately I’ve been feeling really blah. Part of it is that I’ve been practically living in my car and doing so many things away from home that when I AM home, I don’t want to do anything that needs to be done. I’m cluttered. I need to DEclutter so badly. My car, my room, my life, etc. But where does one start?

And then I have begun to wonder: Would I even be READY to be married in the state in which I live? Seriously… SHARE a room with someone? Closet and storage space?! It’s not that I wouldn’t WANT to, mind you, the question is: would I be able to effectively transition to said sharing? Looking around my pitiful and bulging room, it would appear to me that an overhaul is in order. But again, I ask, where does one start? I’ve got storage bins and organizers aplenty… I’ve got who’s its and what’s it galore! You want lots of makeup bags? I got close to 40. Seriously. *sigh*

I think my life needs some new direction, some change, some pull me out of this ruttedness. Is it because Spring is beginning? New life, change and back on the path to a fullness that we call summer? I’m supposed to be in the summer of my life, not the drudgy depths of winter! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not emotionally depressed. Just… stuck right now, I guess. A yearning for whatever it is that’s around the corner… or whizzing down the river… come on deliver to me!!!! This is a random lyric-filled post, too! How many songs can YOU name that I’ve already quoted?! Challenge extended!

OK, ok… any thoughts on decluttering and organizing? Tips and advice and things? It’s getting late, and this post is brought to you by the letters Z and z… Honestly, I’ll try and be better and write more. Just promise me that you’ll comment me and validate me.

Does this mess of a vanity portray my OWN vanity? Sure hope not!!!! Oye!!!

Come What May

I have not blogged for eternity. Am I really THAT boring? Apparently, I guess I am. One of my gal pals once again saves the day with an idea that I think I can write about. Now, many moons ago, I wrote about the girls that walk in the light, see the post here!

Now, again, I am not one of these girls that walk in the light, thus I don’t particularly have a lot of dating experience, per se. Some may say I’m the Queen of the Unrequited, or the non-girlfriend aka, always the buddy but never the boo. So, the thought then comes down to this: when you are one of the girls that doesn’t date very much, how do you not overthink things when you DO go on a date, or find someone for whom perhaps you could develop an interest?

For example, say you aren’t asked out very often… When it DOES happen, it’s such a novelty, so you put all kinds of pressure on yourself and the situation. Or even if you aren’t presented with many people in whom you can BE interested… When you meet someone new for whom you could potentially develop an interest, how do you not get carried away, thus creating all kinds of pressure and unrealistic expectations?

I guess when all is said and done, it’s just important to focus on the fact that what will happen, will happen… And as we try to keep ourselves realistically grounded, we have a better chance at not creating a non-existent relationship that may lead to an uncalled for heartbreak (all in 15 minutes)!

Of course that’s usually easier said than done isn’t it? It seems to me that anticipation, for some reason, is a hurdle for humans. When we approach any type of change or potential change in life, we tend to get all worked up, anxious or put out simply from the anticipation of an event/circumstance, and the anticipation is often worse than the actual occurrence! The only solution I can come up with, is that in order to best endure these situations in life, we must focus on being solid in our principles, having faith in ourselves and our God, knowing that He will guide and direct us as we are willing to heed Him. I think that when we are happy where we’re at in our life, we can always weather whatever might come our way. It’s when we are placing our happiness/contentment on the next phase or experience that we end up lost, unhappy and filled with regret. Carpe Diem, people! Seize the day, YOUR day, be happy where you are, and with who you are, and come what may, you’ll be ready for it and you’ll be happy to greet it!

While I'm at it...

Hopefully the comment moderation will come in handy... should i change it to the setting that only registered users can leave comments? thoughts? discuss. Now, moving along... I think I owe you all a proper blog entry with all this hullabaloo.

And who best to turn to, but Jane Austen? By now you all know of my obsession with all things Jane. While at Barnes and Noble recently, I had wandered into the Valentine's Day section and was somehow drawn to: The Jane Austen Companion to Love. Shocking, yes, I know. It is yet another compilation of some of her quotes - both from books and letters she'd written. So, to this book I turn.

"Nothing can compare to the misery of being bound without Love, bound to one, & preferring another. That is a Punishment which you do not deserve." - from a letter to her niece, Fanny Knight.

This is what I am so often talking about. Even in today's society we see that people settle on the one who asks rather than waiting for the one which is actually worth waiting! There are, I'm sure, plenty of reasons for marrying someone for whom you have mediocre feelings... Most of which are probably centered on a lack of self-worth. But really, who are you not to be beautiful and amazing? As long as we are being our best and striving to ever improve and be the happy, confident individuals our Heavenly Father created us to be, we have every reason to expect felicity in life - with or without marriage, I daresay :)

Comment po-po

OK, after reading through the comments from those of my beloveds that would like to stay in my loop, I have decided to give the comment police deal a whirly gig... and see how that goes before I go all out and set this bad mammer jammer to private...

Going private

I keep getting some sketchy suspicious comments posted - in another language. I'm worried that it may be posting links to something inappropriate. Therefore the decision is being made to go private. Although I don't update my blog as often as i SHOULD, if you would like to maintain access to my bloggy blog, please let me know so that I might be able to send you an invite. Thanks! Sorry for any inconvenience !!